Motivate Me
The best part about this post is that I was totally motivated to write it at the time I made the Twitter comment. Then it faded into nothing and I got distracted with work and dogs and ducks and a bunny… ADHD was on display, folks. And it was shining.
It’s been a long time since I’ve updated this site and it’s overdue. You might say that I wasn’t particularly motivated. But recently I’ve been seeing more and more crap from the fitness world that I hate, so I’m back on my B.S. and I guess you can add “petty grievance” to the list of motivators.
I came back to the Twitter post and it just wasn’t there. That drive to put ink to paper or, well, pixels to a blank screen… That doesn’t even sound enjoyable. But that really is the crux of the this entry, isn’t it? How do you get motivated to do the thing?
Well, it depends on what the current thing is, but let’s stick to the theme of the website: health and fitness. And Star Wars, of course. I’m going to start with running through what my typical day looks like and how I manage to get things done, because one comment that I hear all the time is, “how do you get all that into one day? The chances are 1,346,352… to one.”
Never tell me the odds.
5:30am: Yes. Gross. Disgusting. Tragic, even. But the reality is this is when mother nature tells our dogs that it’s time, and I’ve got a tiny bladder. So out of bed with the dog or the alarm and the real trick is to stay out of bed. Don’t hit snooze. Don’t climb back in–that’s sabotage. 10/10 if you go back to bed you’ll wake up more tired and groggy than you were in the first place.
While I’m outside with the dogs, it’s the same time the ducks are up and quacking away. They need fresh water, food and a snack. Some lettuce, or leftover scrap veggies do the trick so a hot minute in the kitchen happens, too.
Duck duty takes about 20 minutes, all in. Maybe a bit of hay to scoop up and replace, maybe it’s a scene from Hoth. Back inside, and feed the dogs their breakfast. You’re up, they’re up and they want food. By the time this is done, it’s usually between 6:00am and 6:30am. Gillian is usually up by now to take care of the bunny, but if not, I’m a happy alternative.
6:30am - 6:45am: Gillian actually does a cardio workout. Steady-state, Peloton ride – sometimes it’s HIIT. Not my deal. I’m making my breakfast, prepping my lunch and snacks for the day and getting in the shower.
7:30am: The boy is up and by 8:00am we’re out the door on the way to school and then to the office.
I eat breakfast in the office and my work day usually flies by because it’s hectic or I’m running around the city from meeting to meeting. Gillian starts work around 8:30am or 9:00am, but is in meetings until 5:00 or 6:00pm, almost daily… Again, gross.
4:30pm: this is usually when I get home with the boy unless he’s got something going on at school. If that’s the case I stick around in the office a little longer. But this is where the fun starts because the evenings are packed. I’ve got a workout, dogs, dinner, ducks and cardio to fit in before it’s time for bed.
Workout: it’s either a weight workout or I’m running with the dogs. Dog runs are about four miles and then a mile with old Huey (he can’t really run, so he’s my cool-down dog), and weights are about 45 minutes or so. Weight days have thirty minutes on the ol’ hamster wheel, too.
Full disclosure: bedtime around here is embarrassingly early and usually doesn’t happen later than 9:30pm or 10:00pm. I’m ugly and need my beauty sleep. Then we rinse and repeat.
One key to this entire mess of a day is that I’ve come to appreciate the instant gratification of doing things and not putting them off. From dishes before they get crusty, to squats and deadlifts that I’m not in the mood for. I get the dishes done right away because a clean and tidy kitchen leaves nothing to feel anxious about. When I get my workout done, I feel great and that’s worth doing the work. If I don’t do the workout, I don’t get that great feeling.
I set myself up for success and that’s something I’ve been trying to teach our kids. Don’t screw over “Future You”. Set them up for success so they appreciate “Current You”, which will become “Past You”, I suppose… MARTY!! We have to go BACK…
And let’s be honest about it. All the horse shit you hear health and fitness people go on about feeling good and energetic and blah, blah, BARF… it’s painfully true. When I hold myself accountable, set myself up for success and follow through on the things I’ve got going on… I feel awesome. I’ve got energy to spare.
We still go out and socialize with our friends here and there and we aren’t really missing out on anything because we still do the things we love to do. That’s the motivation, too. I want to keep playing soccer, riding my bike, running with my dogs and quacking with the ducks. If I want to do that, I have to stay on track.
So really truly, there’s no big secret to motivation. It’s almost purely selfish. You do the thing because it’s going to make you feel good. You do it for yourself. Even if that thing is sitting on the couch and rewatching Rogue One. So go ahead. Treat yo’self.
The one about injuries…
As you may have guessed the main reason I’ve been absent from the site is because I’m a lazy person who seldom finishes anything he starts. Beyond this small but very important detail is the fact I’ve been injured. And this time it wasn’t just my ego.
It was between ten and eleven weeks ago—I don’t remember the exact week it happened—when I took a hit during a soccer match right in the side of my rib cage. Everything from breathing to laying down was painful for the next little while and it actually took me an extra week and a scary run-in with the bench press to decide to stay out of the gym and let this mess heal up. The main reason for staying out of the gym was so I could continue to play soccer each week; my working theory was as long as I got enough active rest after each game, I ought to be in good enough condition to play the next match. So don’t worry—Vince didn’t go and become “responsible” while he was away.
I decided it was important for me to take this seriously because of just how uncomfortable the simple everyday tasks had become. Not serious enough to stay off the soccer field where I would continuously be hit by other players and potentially worsen the situation, but still. Whatever—let’s glass over those details and find the takeaway points. Being injured sucks but it’s an opportunity to focus on your weaknesses (apart from whatever injury you’re dealing with).
My biggest weakness is probably pizza and a good Star Wars reference but a close third is knowing when to stop and rest. I famously ruptured my pubic symphysis years ago after pulling my groin and continuing to play twelve matches in eight days of an indoor soccer tournament. I did not enjoy the following six weeks of recovery. Before that lovely little number I fractured my scaphoid and went snowboarding in the mountains for a week because it was in a cast and honestly what better protection is there than a fiberglass cast? These are but examples in the long journey to learning my lesson and grappling with simply staying in one spot. And to be fair, playing soccer week in and week out while running and hoping my ribs would feel “good enough” to play isn’t the lesson learned…
“I cannot teach him… the boy has no patience.” Jedi Master, Yoda.
So here’s the important thing to take home after an injury happens (outside of seeking any necessary immediate medical attention, of course): take your time. The world is going to continue to turn; there’s another game next week; appreciate the down time and find your weakness to come back better. Be patient.
In the last few weeks I’ve been running and making sure not to continue the “gains train” meal plan. I’m feeling pretty alright and while my ribs still bother me here and there, I’m down about nine or ten pounds and I’ve got new bright green running shoes. The strength will come back quickly and I nearly matched my “pull day” workout tonight from the last time I did it. See? It’s not all bad.
Take it easy, boys and girls—until next time,
-v
Why the F^$% am I Doing This…?
Let me paint you a picture. Close your eyes. Actually don’t because you need to read this… You know what I mean.
It’s raining, and you’re in a small clay hut with someone that you will soon come to know as Yoda. You’re young, impatient and eager to find this Jedi Master but before this creature will take you further in your journey he asks:
“Why wish you become Jedi?”
Now, you’re not Luke Skywalker and I’m not Yoda but we could be… Aside, it takes us to our topic of the week--nay, of our lives. Yes, that is exactly how passionate about this I am. Becoming a Jedi--sorry.
The journey of a healthy lifestyle and making changes that will better your overall physical and mental health is a long one; and if you plan on reaching your goal, you’re going to need to first know why you’re doing it. Whenever we offer advice to people it always starts with asking them to tell us why they are going to commit to this trial. The reason why you commit has to be something that is going to fuel you for weeks, months and maybe years.
Many a padawan will tell you that they want to get beach ready; that they want to look good in their wedding dress; or that they need to lose a few pounds for a trip. Those people might make it to that short-term goal on the fuel of vanity but I promise you that it will not last. In my honest opinion, the reason that most people fail in reaching their health and fitness goals is low aim. And you can take that at face value, too. You want to lose a couple pounds for a trip? Seems kind of silly because that trip has an open bar and a breakfast buffet so that you can bring those pounds home with you.
Low aim can be interpreted as a poor goal setting process. Luke wanted to be a Jedi because his father was a Jedi. Well, whoopidy-doo, Luke. That’s not gonna cut it because once you become a Jedi--then what? Luke ultimately understood that he wanted to become a Jedi because he had a calling to play his part in bringing balance to the force. It wasn’t just so that he would be able to move things with the Force. Or look good in his sister’s steel-plated bikini.
When we translate this to the rest of us, it’s important to make your goal something real. And it truly is a personal, soul-searching endeavor. It might be difficult and uncomfortable to come to terms with this goal but the closer it is to your heart the more it will fuel you to stay the course.
I did some online ‘training’ many moons ago giving advice to fellow fitness goof-balls and I always led with, “First of all, why are you doing this?” When people didn’t give me a good answer, or something that was superficial I actually turned them down, telling them that our philosophies weren’t going to jive. My favourite reason was a guy from New Jersey--Let’s call him Colin. At the time he was in his late twenties, worked as a sous chef in a restaurant and was a father of a little 3-4 year old boy. On top of that, he was about 50-60 pounds overweight, according to his doctor. Colin was at risk for heart trouble and all sorts of trouble down the road if he didn’t change his tune. While this medical synopsis is a pretty good reason ‘why’, I asked him if there was anything else, a little more on the emotional side of his life that might be a better, more encompassing reason. Again, a goal of losing weight (read: changing your body composition) isn’t really something that I think is good enough for the long haul. We made a deal that he would come back to me in a week with another reason as to why he was starting this journey.
I honestly didn’t think he was coming back. And I get it--I’m not the nicest person. I can come off as holier-than-thou and I’m really good-looking. But as sure as the sun will rise in the East, Colin came back a week later and emailed me with his reason. I’m paraphrasing, and I should have kept that note:
“Vince -- I’ve got it and if this isn’t a good enough reason then I’m going to die trying to get there. It’s my kid and my wife. It came to me while kicking a ball back and forth with my son in the backyard and after ten or so minutes I was exhausted! He was so happy that I was playing with him but there was absolutely no way that I could keep going. I thought to myself, ‘what’s going to happen in a year; 5 years; 10 years?’ If I can’t keep up with him and bring him that joy now, how am I going to keep up with him when he’s not an infant running circles around me? Simply put, I owe it to my family to be better--to be there for them and experience things at their side instead of on the sidelines.”
Again, that’s not word for word but it’s damn close. And let me tell you: if I had the physical ability to shed a tear I would have. That was the kind of goal that would carry Colin for years and would keep him following his plan for a healthier lifestyle overall. Fast-forward a full two years and a bunch of hard work later and Colin is off his medications and he’s lost 40-50 lbs and it’s staying off and he’s running, jumping and playing with his son like it’s nothing. Happiness is everywhere.
I will never, ever take the credit for the success of others--you put in the work, you avoid that third, fourth and fifth cookie of the night. But if there is something that I will gladly take credit for, it’s helping you understand and appreciate the power of a proper goal for your health and fitness.
That, and the triangle solo that was played at the March 25, 2008 Foo Fighters concert in Winnipeg (true story, ask literally anyone that was sitting next to me).
Feel the force around you. Or think about your reason why. Both work.
-v
The Marginal Utility of Health and Fitness 2: It’s What’s for Dinner
I cannot stress this enough: once you have an idea on calories and what various foods are ‘worth’, stop counting calories!!
Hearing this from anyone in the health and fitness world might make you wonder what they’re really on about and if they have any idea what they’re talking about. But, in reality, counting calories is a massive headache and will make you go crazy. I promise. I spent three months counting calories when I was in my 20’s and it was incredibly beneficial for my understanding of the caloric content of the things I was stuffing into my face. But it comes with a slippery slope that can lead to an obsession with the numbers.
In keeping with the theme of the marginal utility of health and fitness, I want to talk about nutrition and will preface this with the idea that if you’re making a big change to your nutrition you might want to run it by your doctor--especially if you’re diabetic, have thyroid issues, or any number of other food-related issues.
Food is super important to me and I really want to talk to you all about it more often so, while this blog is a little all over the place, I promise to come back for seconds and thirds and desserts and midnight snacks to talk more on it.
Food, the whole food, and nothing but the food
I live for food (and dogs… and my family, fine) but there are obviously some food choices that do not live for me. It’s a wicked world out there and everyone is going to tell you that the best way of eating is X. The catch, as I’m sure you’ve already guessed, is that we are all different and we all have preferences. If I told you that you should eat fish and peanut butter to give you optimal performance, you might really dislike the taste and you’d lose out on all the joy that food brings to your life.
The rule of thumb that I tell everyone is simple: lean proteins and healthy fats, bright coloured fruits and vegetables, whole grains when you can, and do your level best to cut out ‘added sugar’. Pre-packaged food is never my first option, but let’s be honest, we can’t always be in the kitchen and we can’t always stick to our best-laid-plans.
Real food will always trump something that has been made for you and packed up for convenience. There’s a thing called bio-availability that relates to the ability of your body to break down a food and use the nutrients that it’s meant to provide. Real, whole food is almost always more bio-available to your body than most anything else.
Where does the marginal utility of healthy eating come into play? Happiness. Pure utility. I grew up with food at the center of family gatherings, hanging out with friends--it was a key tool to bringing people together and thus a major part of that was making sure the food was enjoyable. But the double-sided chef’s knife will have you learn quickly that not everyone wants to gather around a plate of three-bean salad and kale smoothies when they can have chicken wings and beers.
I don’t really like the saying that ‘everything is fine in moderation’ because there are a lot of things that I just won’t eat. Fast food, for example, has been off the menu for a long time and even eating at a restaurant gets cut down because I can either make it myself for less, or I don’t know what’s in it or where it came from, etc. Snobby AF, I know. So what does Uncle Vince do?
I eat real food as much as possible. I don’t beat myself up when I fall off the rails but I make sure to not make that a habit. I stop eating crappy food and cut back on the snacking (I’m looking at you, giant bag of spicy dill pickle chips).
But I eat (and make) bread like it’s going out of style. It’s delicious and if you make your own you can control the amount of sugar (and literally everything else) and you can eat it while it’s fresh outta the oven! I love pizza, too. I eat it almost once a week (check the Instagram proof!) but it’s not a take out, greasy mess--it’s homemade and checks all the boxes I need it to check: tasty, cheesy, right amount of sauce, and plenty of it. I love BBQ, beer, chips and guacamole, hot dogs, salads, pasta, steak, shrimp, cereals--this list goes on forever and I swear that I’ll never change (unless medically prescribed and even then you’ll have to pry eggs and bacon from my cold, dead hands).
“But, Vince,” you may think, “how does that fit into a healthy lifestyle? Hot dogs??”
Moderation (barf) is applicable here. And the joy I get from eating the foods that I love. Think of moderation as the marginal utility of food (read: the tenth piece of pizza hurts me). If I have to eat my planned meals today because tomorrow I’m going to bury all my feelings in a buffet of Indian food, so be it. If I’m ‘good’ all week, I do my workouts and generally stay healthy then the marginal utility from the sushi that I have on Saturday is really high. If I’m destroying myself all week with bad food choices, that sushi doesn’t score so high.
How do I get the most utility out of food? Over the years (yes, I’m old) I’ve understood the caloric density of various foods; the nutritional value of snacks and supplements (more on that later) and a bunch of ins and outs. I eat fairly intuitively now, but keep it on a pretty consistent schedule. I would like to think that when I do eat, the food had better be as delicious and nutritious as possible. If someone is telling you that they are using food only as fuel to achieve their goals then, in my humble opinion, they’ve never had my slow-roasted pork shoulder. Food must bring joy. And I’m really happy if this annoys the ever-loving sh!t out of the multi-billion dollar fitness world because I’ve seen people try and follow those standards and developed a six-pack followed by food anxiety, eating disorders and worse. Food isn’t your enemy--highly processed food is. Pre-packaged and pre-made food is. Added sugar is bad. But, food is incredible and delicious and you should enjoy the F out of it.
If you do anything good for your health and fitness and wellness--enjoy food. Just don’t turn a blind eye to poor choices. There is, afterall, a future where we all look like Jabba the Hutt (I freakin’ love the scene where he’s just chillin’ with Leia and dropping food into his face… this doesn’t sound bad, actually).
Portion control is massive. If you look at the amount of food you get at your favourite burger joint, you cannot tell me it was meant for a single person. One of the local places here will give you a burger that can easily be shared (except I would never) and enough fries to end a potato famine. Controlling the sheer volume of the food on your plate is really important and one of the easiest tricks is to use a smaller plate. But don’t starve yourself.
For those of you that wonder, here’s a typical day (and typical should give you the impression that I’m pretty hella consistent with this schedule):
I’m up with the dogs at 5:30am and then, after getting ready, I’m off to the office. I don’t eat in the morning apart from a cup or two (or three) of coffee and that’s about the extent of my food until around 2:00pm (side bar: when I was younger I literally could not function without eating first). My first meal is something with a lot of protein, healthy fats and my multi-vitamins if I remember to take them. My go-to is eggs and <insert leftover meat here>, with some cream cheese--all wrapped into a… a wrap. Why does this work for me? Simple: I really love eggs and I fry them up with a bit of butter because that’s the best. Cream cheese is delicious. Wraps make food portable and handy. Eggs, when cooked, provide a complete protein and amino acid profile, contain healthy omega fatty acids, and the extra meat that I throw in there ups the protein and general deliciousness. Did I mention that cream cheese is super tasty?
After that, I’m pretty good until dinner/supper/whatever you want to call it. This meal can be anything from pasta with veggies and garlic toast, to chicken with broccoli. Chicken should never be dry or rubbery, veggies should have a bit of butter and if the meal pairs well with a glass of wine or a beer, then so be it (mind you we don’t really drink during the week at all).
You’ve spent all this time reading and thinking about food, you’re probably a little peckish. Post your questions, comments and favourite go-do meal below. And then ask yourself why your answer isn’t “pancakes”.
Stay hungry (literally don’t),
-v
The Marginal Utility of Health and Fitness
This is probably the most important blog/essay/rambling that you’ll ever read and that I’ll ever write. It’s the meat and potatoes of everything in the industry I feel is right, wrong and undeniably frustrating. It’s why I despise the health and fitness industry. It’s why I LOVE the fact that a local trainer referred to us as a ‘filter for the bullshit’ in the fitness world. Deep breath...
There’s a thing in economics called marginal utility. It measures the ‘utility’ of a thing and follows the laws of reduced return. It’s measured in a fun thing called a ‘util’. I was completely hammered during that lecture in university and while I still managed to get my minor in Economics, I could be getting the terms a little mixed up. Here’s the example that I’ll never forget:
You have $50 and you love sushi. If you spend $5 on sushi you get 10 utils of happiness. If you spend another $5 on sushi, you get 8 utils. At some point the money you put into sushi is no longer worth the utils of happiness that you get out of it. It’s similar to the law of diminishing returns. This law of marginal utility applies just about everywhere and, most importantly because this is a health and fitness blog, in the world of health and fitness.
The crux of this one is to identify what aspects of the health and fitness world are worth it, and which ones just give you bragging rights, or are just… I don’t know, stupid. So let’s dig into it and start from the top before we get into the reeds. At what point does your health and fitness regime stop being beneficial and just becomes cumbersome?
Part One
Let’s start with the actual amount of time you spend in the gym (read: time spent actively improving your health and fitness).
Unless it’s your hobby and you don’t have anything else that you like doing, working out every day of the week is stupid. From the point of view of changing your body composition, gaining strength, getting ripped or building physical size or whatever--you need rest. This is the biggest thing that drives me crazy because it makes people think that they have to work out everyday to see change or that if they miss a workout they’re going to lose everything, get fat and die.
Not hardly! If you’re a trainer and you tell your client that they need to train every day, you’re hurting them. You’re hurting the entire industry of health and fitness. It simply isn’t the case, unless you’re actively training for a competition but even then, the continued training has diminishing returns and after so many continuous days, you’re no longer gaining anything other than soreness, opportunity for injury and a lack of a life outside the gym.
So how do you maximize the utility of working out? To be honest, it’s all about the individual and how much you’re willing to give up. Personally, I like to workout 4-5 times a week but that’s if I have the time for it. I like to run with my dogs and my wife, I like to lift weights and I like to play soccer. Running is something that I like to do and it benefits my overall level of health and fitness. It’s a 25 minute ordeal to get a couple of kilometers in and I always feel good afterward. That’s kind of where I draw the line with running because I really don’t enjoy running; I get bored and it becomes a chore. The marginal utility of running, for me, is anywhere between 2.5km and 5km. After that I’ve checked out and my time is better spent elsewhere.
When it comes to good ol’ fashioned clangin’ and bangin’, it’s a little different. My focus lately has been hitting a number of sets per week, per muscle group. This is typically somewhere between 12-20 sets and it depends on what I’m doing. What this translates to can look really different for lots of people. Let’s take a chest and shoulder routine as an example and pretend it looks like this:
Barbell bench press: 4 sets, 12 reps
Overhead dumbbell shoulder press: 4 sets, 12 reps
Incline cable pec (chest) flye: 4 sets, 10 reps
45 degree bent over delt flye: 4 sets, 10 reps
Above, you have eight total sets of chest exercises and eight total sets of delt/shoulder exercises; these count against my weekly goal, which coincides with my overall goal for my health and fitness. If I were to complete the four exercises above, I’m looking at roughly 30 minutes, start to finish. Now, I have to look at what the rest of my week needs to look like to meet my goal to determine if this is going to cut it or not. I have legs, back, arms and core to fit into this schedule so I likely need to increase the length of each workout a little to get it all complete within four days, and not spend much more than 45 minutes in the gym working out.
The plan here is to do as much as I can without losing out on my free time, and not getting so sore that I can’t enjoy life. I like to be able to tie my shoes and don’t much care for not being able to lift my arms for three days. More reps, more sets, but gaining the utils without getting so sore that the return on my fitness investment is not giving me that negative result. Not only do I despise being sore, it’s not really a true meter of progress. When someone tells you that they wear their gym-soreness as a badge of progress I’m going to argue that they’re a little off the mark. My badge of progress is navigating the stairs in the house and being able to sit on the toilet without inadvertently imitating a cripple. You don’t want to waste the next day or two being sore--you want to go out and run with your dogs, ride your bike with your partner or putter about the yard comfortably.
And the secret is that you’re still making progress toward your overall goal for your health and fitness. You’re putting in the optimal amount of training time to get the most utility and return from that effort. This whole idea of marginal utility is absent across so many fitness platforms and it’s a major hindrance for people getting into a health and fitness regime.
The long and short here is that taking on a program to better your overall health and fitness profile shouldn’t interfere with the rest of your life and, truly, it should be paying dividends for you. You shouldn’t expect to have the body of Superman or Wonderwoman inside of a week, but you should also enjoy what you’re doing and see results and progress toward your goal.
I just realized that I wrote an entire blog and didn’t make a single Star Wars reference, so… May the Force be with you.
-v
A Write-up on the Importance of Writing it Down.
I read somewhere that it was important to write things down because if you don’t write things down you won’t remember what you did and you won’t know what to do if you can’t remember what you did. Yes, that is a horrible run-on sentence, constructed for comedic effect. But really, thank goodness that person wrote that profound idea down!
Imagine going into your day, not just your workout, without a plan. It’s horribly reckless, really. A rookie move, to be sure. Personally, I’d be in a full blown panic if there were no notes about what had been done the day before. And to top it off, I’d feel like the work I did was kind of pointless and wasted because what would I be comparing it to?
Nothing. Nadda. Zilch and zero.
There are many reasons that you should keep a journal, and not just for exercise or hyperspace coordinates (the latter being of great importance). There are so many factors that tie into your success in any action-adventure saga that it would be impossible to keep them all in your head, so naturally you need to find a way to get them out of your brain and into the ether. So why not write it down?
Sometimes I’ll write things down because I know that I’m going to forget about them. Other times I write things down to see how silly they are when they’re not in my head so that I can simply choose to never share them with another living person.
When we focus this idea on the world of health and fitness, we typically see people preaching about keeping a workout journal and a nutrition journal. One of these things is a horrible task that I do not support. The other is a workout journal. Keep in mind this is not just jotting down the sets and reps and weights and numbers from chest day.
If you were foolish enough to find some interest in my workout journals you’d see, literally, years of notes about form, what worked and what didn’t, how I was feeling, and even a list of excuses on why I didn’t want to work out that day. All of it ties together and getting it on paper has never failed to help me get through the routine.
Recently I did a chest routine that has a bunch of notes on arm angle, cable height, where to stand in relation to the machine, whether Vader was really Luke’s father or was it actually only Anakin… <insert mind blown expression>. Along with all of that was how I felt that day and whether or not the next workout would be the same or if I should change the reps/weight/etc. It’s not just a log of what I did, but an action plan for what to do next.
I remember doing a pull-over type move and on the page next to the completed sets I wrote, “This move hurts my feelings and I’m not doing it next time.” So next time, I didn’t do it. If I didn’t write down that the move wasn’t kind and thinking of my feelings I would have made the mistake of doing it again and I would have been sad.
Writing things down is also the only way that I can keep ideas. In reality, my supreme level of attention and recall leaves me needing not for foolish notes. But for the purpose of this blog entry I’ll gladly play the part of the cautionary tale for all of you would-be superstars. The sheer number of legitimately earth-shatteringly good blog post ideas that are near and dear to my heart that I’ve completely lost over the years is staggering. When I think of it, it’s like that time Obi Wan felt all of Alderaan getting blow’d up by the Death Star.
“As if millions of voices suddenly cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced…”
Yeah. Exactly like that.
So write things down. It’s good. But seriously, next time let’s talk about this Darth Vader or Anakin being the father thing……..
-v
Actions speak louder than words
In yesterday’s Instagram post, we asked if your actions always align with your goals. The reality for me is that they don’t… Well, at least not 100% of the time.
Almost every source of information you can access will tell you the importance of nutrition and consistency to help you achieve your goals. Proper nutrition is what fuels your body, water is important, rinse, repeat…we get it. But what do you do when you just don’t feel like it? How do you get back on track to working towards your goals, and sideline those urges to self-sabotage? And most importantly, why do you fall off track to begin with?
Well, that could be a variety of things, but I’m going to assume (I know that makes me an ass) that I am similar to many others and will share with you why I go rogue, and how I get my actions back in line with my goals.
Why do we stop doing the things we need to do to achieve our goals? This is a good question. It’s important to recognize and admit to yourself so you can identify it in the future, and course correct before you get so far off track that you end up in some dark hole searching for support groups to help you with your murder mystery addiction, and the only “suggested for you” videos are of dogs learning how to communicate with their people by pushing buttons that talk.
Here as some things I’ve found that help:
Realistic goals: Is what you want to achieve realistic in the timeframe you’ve identified? If yes, awesome, keep going. If not, it is important to level set, and adjust as necessary. Setting a goal that is unrealistic sets you up for failure, which is incredibly de-motivating and can cause you to give up before you even get going!
Be prepared: What do you need to do to help ensure you are set up for success. Depending on your goals this could mean:
Meal prepping
Researching technique
Setting smaller goals that lead up to your larger goal : i.e.: You want to do unassisted pull-ups. Start with a smaller goal of 10-12 negative pull ups assisted, then unassisted negatives, then assisted pull-ups, and finally…an unassisted pull-up!
And…the one that matters the most, but is the most frequent robber of success:
Confidence: Believe in yourself. Don’t let your mind try and tell you that you can’t do it! Shut that sh*t down! This is a tough one. Those nasty little thoughts that creep in and try and settle in your sub-conscious.
Not everything is going to go smoothly in life as you continue to work towards your goals, but that isn’t a reason to abandon them completely and succumb to the self-sabotage that often accompanies these thoughts of self-doubt.
“Why bother, you’ve already messed up with your meals today, you may as well just eat the rest of that (insert favourite snack food here) and start again tomorrow.” Sound familiar?
It’s ok to miss a meal, or fall short on water intake one day…that doesn’t mean you need to throw your hands up and press the restart button. You aren’t back at the beginning. You are still in it, working towards where you want to be. The path to success isn’t straight. In fact, if I had to compare the journey to achieving a goal, I think it would resemble the drawing a young child makes when first learning how to hold a crayon. It’s messy, all over the place and hard to follow. That’s why its so amazing. It is unique, personalized and cannot be recreated by anyone else. It’s yours to own.
So own it. Don’t give up on it simply because it gets hard.
Here is my suggestion:
Stop. Remember why you started. Ask yourself “Is what I am doing in line with my goal?” if the answer is no, you need to make a decision.
Are you going to change your goal? Or are you going to change your actions?
It’s that simple.
-g
The Jedi Did Yoga and So Should You.
I have always been involved in sport. I’m tuned that way and, when people think about sporty or athletic people, they tend to think of something like hockey, football, soccer, or something along those lines. Think about what these traditional sports have in common: they’re intense; they require higher levels of ability; they typically have participants at high heart rates and go-go-go.
If you saw our Instagram post (and I’m hoping that you liked it and followed us--, shameless, I know) I added three super important things that are essentially the opposite of how I’m (traditionally) tuned.
Sit. Breathe. Enjoy the moment.
Those three words have no real place on the soccer field, in the corners of the rink or in the red zone. But they play a massive part in the success of any athlete, in my opinion. And I challenge you to say otherwise. This all ties into a four-letter word that most of the people that I workout with despise. They hate it. A lot. Like you wouldn’t believe.
Y-O-G-A, baby. Apart from running away from dinosaurs this might be the oldest form of exercise and there’s also a great chance that I made that fact up. Not to worry, it’s not really important. But yoga is. It’s possibly the most important part of your health and fitness and the key to living a better life. So if you don’t do yoga now-- go and do yoga, now.
We can start this with a simple truth about yoga and why, in the ‘western’ world that we live in, it is not so widely accepted. Yoga forces you to be in the moment, which is uncomfortable (on multiple levels) and deal with it in a way that you’re not used to dealing. Let’s unpack this idea before we start on the multi-faceted (saw this word on a juice box and owned it) exercise that is yoga.
Living in the moment; living in the now; no regrats/regurts. Yoga makes you block out the rest of life and be exactly where you are. Focus in the gym, whether you’re clangin’ and bangin’, doing a cardio session or enjoying the zen-like marvel that is yoga, is paramount. Yoga teaches you that focusing on the moment is more than just paying attention to what you’re doing. You have to be there. Buy into the mambo-jumbo that yoga preaches, even if it’s just once. Be there, be purposeful.
Yoga is uncomfortable because it’s difficult, physically. But beyond the physical discomfort that can come with chair-pose, there is a mental struggle that most regular people will face. You have to be quiet and focused and you have to deal with yourself. Your thoughts are the only thing in the room and that scares a lot of people. Being able to quiet your own thoughts and your own mind is a massive challenge. Think about all the things that you do in the day and now, just… don’t. Yoga gives you a chance to be alone with yourself. If that concerns you on any level, yoga is for you.
Put yourself in a warrior-2 pose and stay there for a hot minute. Your legs start to burn; your balance starts to wobble; your arms start swimming around, and; you just want to fall over. How do you deal with this? Unlike grunting your way through the last two reps of your bench press or your super macho barbell curls, yoga provides you with an alternative approach. Something more focused and, if I may, gentle.
Just f*&^ing breathe, baby.
And that, my fine feathered friend, is what breaks many-a-person. There is a challenge to yoga to stay calm, and breathe through the movements--tie the movement to your breath and exist only there. This is something that comes with practice and after at least two or three failures.
For me, yoga was a massive challenge. My background and my ego told me that it was stupid and dumb and had nothing to do with sport or athleticism. Now let me tell you: I’ve been wrong before--one time--I don’t like talking about it. But embracing the challenge and the struggle that yoga provides is the road through.
Balance, core strength, focus, flexibility--these things are critical for injury prevention, improved performance, increased strength, increased focus and peace of mind. If you want to live to be 103--do some yoga. It doesn’t have to be a 90-minute haul--you can find 15-20 minutes to work on a posture that you feel is beneficial to you, or maybe it’s just a mountain that you want to climb.
For the next little while I’m going to be watching you and lending some tips for those of you that are still non-believers. Keep up-to-date with our Instagram account (@thecollectivewpg) and check back here on the workout tab. Yoga is that important. Trust me if on no other topic. If there is a way to get in touch with the Force, this is it.
Sit. Breathe. Enjoy the moment.
-v
Growing through Grief
A bit of a raw topic today, but one that I feel is important to discuss.
Grief…what does it look like? How do you deal with it? When does it get better?
The answer to all of these questions? I don’t know.
Grief is different for everyone. Whether you are dealing with the loss of a loved one, a relationship, a pet, or a job. Grief is hard, and unpredictable. I’ve experienced loss in my life, as most of us have, but it wasn’t until we lost Dad in 2019, that I really had to sit with it, and deal with the overwhelming, and sometimes lasting waves of hurt and loss that can exist (and still does) when someone you assumed would always be there just isn’t.
Someone once gave me an analogy that really resonated, and for me, represents an accurate picture of the grieving process.
Picture a ball in a box. The ball represents feelings of grief, pain and loss. The box represents you, and when you experience those feelings. Immediately following the loss, the ball fills up the box almost entirely. You feel it constantly, and it can consume you.
Over time, the ball starts to get smaller in size allowing it to move freely within the box. Sometimes, it won’t touch the sides of the box at all, other times, it will bump along the sides, flooding you with those all-to familiar feelings of sadness and pain.
The tricky part here is that you just never know when that ball will touch the sides.
Feelings of grief comes in waves, you can’t always prepare for it, and it doesn’t always show itself in the most convenient of circumstances, but…it’s a process.
Loss (in whatever capacity you are experiencing it) isn’t something you are meant to get over, but in time, you will get through it. The key is to show yourself the compassion you show for others. Feel what you need to feel, and don’t apologize for doing what you need to do to get through those moments the ball hits the sides of the box.
When you allow yourself those moments of real emotion, you will see growth. Growth in your ability to cope, and your willingness to accept.
The grief we feel is not only a representation of loss, but of what we had. Your feelings are valid. The box and ball will continue to coexist through time. My hope for anyone experiencing loss in any capacity is that one day, the box also contains memories that make you smile, and allow room for feelings of gratitude for having had the experience of love.
As someone who continues to teach me things says… sometimes life gets squishy. Thanks for being here for the squishy parts.
-Gillian
It’s the same old, same old…
Have you heard the one about the Catholic priest and the Rabbi where they get into a bit of a fender bender? Well, the two of them calmly discuss the details of the accident and the Rabbi says, “You know what? I think that, despite our religious differences, God wanted us to meet.”
“What a glorious thought. I do agree that the Lord works in mysterious ways,” replied the Priest.
“You know,” said the Rabbi, “I just happen to have a very nice bottle of wine in the car and I propose that we have a toast to this meeting--perhaps the start of a wonderful relationship.”
The Priest agrees and the Rabbi pulls out the bottle of wine and two glasses. He pours the Priest a drink and hands it to him adding, “This is one of my very favourite bottles--go ahead and taste this!”
The Priest obliges and downs the wine--his eyes light up and he says, “My that is truly exquisite--but aren’t you going to have any?”
The Rabbi replies to the Priest, “Of course, but I think that I’ll wait until after the police arrive…”
There are a lot of things in the world of health and fitness and most notably are the different fads and trends that come and go. One thing that I urge people to do is to look for and listen to people that spit out the same drivel week in and week out. Year in and year out. It sounds boring as all hell but think about it: If someone is successful and has been saying the same thing forever…
They must be on to something.
There is something that you will, if you stick around, notice about me: I’m horribly repetitive. Whether it’s stories, exercise methods, recipes or [bad] jokes.
While hearing the same story or the same incredibly funny joke week in and week out isn’t exactly the point here, the type of repetitive behaviour that I’m talking about is a good thing. The health and fitness industry is a horrible machine that will chew up and spit out trendy nutritional information and wacky exercise gadgets faster than Han Solo made the Kessel run. And the biggest pitfall to any trainer (or their loyal clients) out there is buying into these trends and then jumping on to the next one.
So if you were to ask me what the keys to living better and being in better overall shape; having a better health profile (physically and mentally); all that wonderful crap was--I’m going to tell you the same thing that I heard and adopted some 15-20 years ago. That’s not to say that I’m still doing the same routines and the same moves, but I’m following the exact same advice and the exact same mentality.
I work out because I want to keep doing the things that I love to do, well into the twilight of my age. I play competitive soccer at the age of 40--against 20-25 year old punks (and with 20-25 year old punks--shout out to V3FC). I love hiking in the mountains, trekking with my dogs and cycling on trails with my wife. I want to keep doing all of these things and more--so I have to keep my body prepared to do that stuff. My reason for working out has always been the same.
My three rules for health and fitness have been stolen, shamelessly, and I make no bones about it--I’m happy to say that these three words were plagiarized from Tony Sawyer Horton himself: variety, consistency and intensity (in ten cities). The three word motto stuck with me because it was what I was taught and it was what really summed up my own belief and understanding.
The variety in your life/on your plate/in your gym is the key to keeping you from going crazy and only ever getting to wear those comfy self-hugging jackets in rooms with pillows on the wall. Without losing the idea of movement mastery (another story for another visit to Blogtopia), spicing up your life with some change is always a good idea. Look, I love to play soccer and I hate going for a run (figure that out!)--so I add in cardio to my routine that gets me breathing and moving in different ways, whether it’s HIIT training, regular intervals or even something a little more engaging.
Consistency is the second word in the trio of terror and it does not have anything to do with the lumps in Gillian’s mashed potatoes. Being consistent and keeping up with a routine is paramount in creating good habits. ‘Nuff said, really. Well, maybe not: stick to your guns and don’t jump on every fad or trend that comes to town.
Intensity (in ten cities) is the last of the Jedi-like mentality that I’ll talk about today. Being in the room, while it is an achievement in and of itself, doesn’t always cut it. Simply lifting the dumbbell and alternating to the next arm and back again--that ain’t it. Here’s a secret that even my wife doesn’t know: every time I do dumbbell curls I look in the mirror and a couple of the reps have be saying (in my head), “...another suitor for the Princess…”
If you know, you know. If you don’t, you haven’t watched the animated Disney version of Aladdin lately, and shame on you. It’s a scene where there are two old men watching yet another prince of some type wander to the palance to court the lovely Princess. Boring. Repetitive. Dull. Nothing special at all.
The solution is simple: make each rep and each movement more like Aladdi--err, Prince Ali of Alibabba. Focused, goal-oriented, and intense.
That’s it. That’s all. You want to live better and be better and be healthier? Then wish for my freedom. And follow the three rules of variety, consistency and intensity.
To end this week’s entry into the Bloggerdome, I’ll tell you a great joke: A Rabbi and a Priest get into a car accident…
-v